Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Love Dare - Day 28

(Photo source All Posters)
You might wonder why I am writing more about this day's dare than some of the others. Is it that the others are not that important? By any means, NO! I am sharing more on this day because, as a whole, people in general are very selfish. I say this not to offend anyone, but simply to state a fact. In helping others, we may do it begrudgingly or willingly. What we all need to work on is helping others without thinking deep down, "how can this ultimately benefit me?" No, not everyone has hidden agendas when it comes to serving others but if you really took an honest assessment of yourself, would there be any underlying selfishness in something you have done for another? Was it for recognition? A pat on the back? To make you feel better? Etc.

A better question might be, why haven't you done something for someone else lately? Would it inconvenience you? Would it cost you something that your not willing to part with, like time, energy, resources or pride?

When it comes to our spouses, the biggest area that we need to work on is self sacrifice. In marriage there is absolutely no room for selfishness. But all too often, we bring with us the baggage of "me-itis." We know when we feel hurt or mistreated. We know when we've been wronged. But when our spouse expresses their hurts, mistreatment or other, do we look at them and chalk it up as they just have a bad attitude? Do we adapt the "it didn't happen to meme" or "eh...they'll get over it" attitude? If you're honest with yourself, you may be guilty of this. I know I have been at times.

Day 28 - Love makes Sacrifices

I John 3:16 "HE laid down HIS life for us. We should also lay down our lives for our brothers."

Love makes sacrifices. It keeps you so tuned in to what your spouse needs that you often respond without being asked. And when you don't notice ahead of time & must be told what's happening, love responds to the heart of the problem.

Love inspires you to say "no" to what you want, in order to say "yes" to what your spouse needs.

Some of the types of needs you should be looking for in your spouse can be:
  • Is he "hungry" - needing you sexually, even when you don't feel like it?
  • Is she "thirsty" - craving the time & attention you seem able to give to everyone else?
  • Does he feel like a "stranger" - insecure in his work, needing home to be a refuge & sanctuary?
  • Is she "naked" - frightened or ashamed, desperate for the warm covering of your loving affirmation?
  • Is he feeling "sick" - physically tired & needing you to help guard him from interruptions?
  • Does she feel in "prison" - fearful & depressed, needing some safety & intervention?
The words "how can I help you" should always stay fresh on your lips. The solutions may be simple & easy for you to do, or they may be complex & expensive, requiring time, energy & great effort. Either way, you should do whatever you can to meet the real needs of the one who is a part of who you are. After all, when you help them, you are also helping yourself. That's the beautiful part of sacrificing for your spouse. JESUS did it for us, and HE extends the grace to do it for others.

Today's dare: What is one of the greatest needs in your spouse's life right now? Is there a need you could lift from their shoulders today by a daring act of sacrifice on you part? Whether the need is big or small, purpose to do what you can to meet the need.

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