Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Walking Away Without Guilt

(Image Source)
We all face circumstances from time to time that cause us to either 'want' or 'need' to simply walk away. When on a diet, the infamous chocolate cake can peek it's head out with temptation, so we have to learn to walk away. When we do, we feel so much better than had we taken a bite. When someone, say a co-worker, does their best to try & make work life for those around him miserable and is always trying to cause confrontation with others, we can either choose to let it get to us & sink to their level or simply walk away and take the higher ground. Family relationships can be another forum where we can run into obstacles that might cause us to have to make a choice to either stand by & allow that person to continually use and abuse the relationship, or we can choose to love them but separate ourselves from them by simply walking away.  
No matter what the situation is, it's never an easy choice to make. Emotional ties are some of the hardest to walk away from -- there are memories that can't be erased & shouldn't be....the good times that were shared together and even the rough patches that were endured - but none the less, they were endured together. There may have been times when you didn't speak to each other for stretches at a time -- sometimes for no reason except the busyness of life & other times it may have been due to an actual issue) -- but when you began communicating again, it was as if nothing ever happened & you never had that lull in the relationship to begin with. This is part of what makes relationships true relationships. 
But what do you do when a relationship continually veers to the path of the one way road? What do you do when differences between individuals in the relationship seem to keep poking out like thorns on a rose rose bush? Please understand me, I know that GOD created us all as individuals and therefore we all have our own way of doing things, our own ideas, etc. That's what makes us individuals. What I am referring to is when individuality is used against another person. You may have different taste in music, but does that give you the right in a relationship to tell the other person that they are trash because of their preference? (I'm not talking about vulgar or profane music style.) Just because one or the other lives in a style of home that the other isn't used to...(for example, if you have always lived in a house & never experienced apartment living) does that give them the right to make derogatory remarks about it & say things that would reflect they feel you are lesser for living there? When one is going through a storm in life & the other calls upon you for support, your there in any fashion you can be. But when the table is turned, do they reciprocate or do you simply get a sad face emoticon via text message? No matter the relationship, be it friend, family or other, the road to making it work can only happen if both parties are willing to travel it together.
The Bible tells us that we are to turn the other cheek...Am I saying that other person in the relationship is evil or a sinner because of their actions...no. What I am saying is what JESUS told us in HIS Word...and that is this...
Matthew 5:38-45a "Ye have heard that it hath been said, An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth: But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also. And if any man will sue thee at the law, and take away thy coat, let him have thy cloak also. And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away. Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven:
Luke 6:27-32 "But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you. And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloak forbid not to take thy coat also. Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again. And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise. For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them."
Is it easy to do...sometimes yes, other times it can be the hardest thing we feel like we've ever done. But there comes a time when we have to separate ourselves from things, including people, that we are unequally yoked with. II Corinthians 6:14 "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?" It's not because these individuals are non-Christian, it's because you are on two different levels in your lives. Neither is higher or lower than the other, they are just levels that don't seem to have a meeting point. So the road will never be able to be traveled upon without meeting the continual pot holes and road blocks. 
The best thing we can do for ourselves and for others is to sit back, pray about a situation and ask GOD what HE would have us do. If you feel in your spirit that HE has given you HIS Word on what HE would have you do, then and only then should you follow it. If HE tells you that HE has a purpose in the situation & that you need to keep turning your cheek, then that is what you must do. Remember, HIS ways are higher than our ways. However, if you feel that HE has given you release over the situation, it is then that you will be able to walk away from that relationship without guilt. Does it mean that you are never to see or speak to that person again? Not necessarily. GOD places people in our lives and across our paths for a reason. We may not fully understand what that reason is, but ours is not to try and analyze. You will still love that person and care about what happens to them. You will still want the best for them but the LORD just may be telling you to do it apart from them. If you don't know how to step back from a a relationship or you feel as if you can't, turn it over to the LORD. HE has HIS ways of weeding & pruning our lives so that some people will eventually just fade from you. They will still be apart of you, but HE can & will add to you in other ways and through other people...people that HE would have in your life. Stand tall and stand strong in the LORD. HE will see you through any situation if we just let HIM. 

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