Thursday, February 26, 2009

Love Dare - Day 5

Proverbs 27:14 "He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him."

Chapter highlights:

To be rude is to act unbecoming, embarrassing or irritating. In marriage, this could be a foul mouth, poor table manners, or a habit of making sarcastic quips. Rude behavior may seem insignificant to the person doing it, but it's unpleasant to those on the receiving end.

hen a man is driven by love, he intentionally behaves in a way that's more pleasant for his wife to be around. If she desires to love him, she purposefully avoids things that frustrate him or cause him discomfort.

The bottom line is that genuine love minds it's manners.

When you allow love to change your behavior, even in the smallest of ways, you restore an atmosphere of honor to your relationship. People who practice good etiquette tend to raise the respect level of the environment around them. If you don't let love motivate you to make needed changes in your behavior, the quality of your marriage relationship will suffer for it.

A man or woman of discretion will find out what is appropriate, then adjust his/her behavior accordingly.

Three guiding principles when it comes to practicing etiquette in your marriage are:
  1. Guard the Golden Rule ~ treat your spouse the same way you want to be treated. (Luke 6:31)
  2. No double standards ~ be as considerate to your spouse as you are to strangers and co-workers.
  3. Honor requests ~ Consider what your spouse already asked you to do or not to do. If in doubt, ask.
Today's dare: Ask your spouse to tell you 3 things that cause him/her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only.

I will admit, this was not a dare that I really wanted to do, after all, who 'wants' to hear your spouse or anyone for that matter tell you what irritates them about yourself. But I digress, and as I made my mind up to do before starting the Love Dare, I am going to follow through regardless of how uncomfortable it might get.

Over dinner I asked hubby what 3 things he wanted to express to me. After thinking for a bit he said he could only come up with 2 things. So I guess that's not a bad thing. I listened and did not put in my 2 cents worth or try and defend or justify anything. I simply let him express his feelings/thoughts. You know it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be to hear what he had to say. Granted I think I already knew in my heart what his items were but 'hearing' them made me think. These are certainly issues that I can and will work on for both my hubby as well as myself.

o far so it's off to day 6.

"The words from the mouth of a wise man are gracious." ~ Ecclesiastes 10:12

1 comment:

Blessed Beyond said...

What a wonderful blessing. This would be really hard, and I think I'll sit down with hubby and ask him, even though I too know what he will say. I'm proud that even though it was a bit harder to ask, than previous dares, that you did it! What a testiment to you and your love for your husband!

Hugs and Blessings,